I should’ve known, you know. The
continuous waft of fish had been lingering around for some time but it really
kicked off the night before. It was time for bed and I headed upstairs and
dutifully stared at the bedside drawer. However, dad just stared at me and made
no attempt to open the drawer for my before bedtime chew. After twenty minutes
or so, I was pretty tired and my teeth have been achy recently, so I let this
break in routine go.
When I woke in the morning with
mild exuberance (mild because I was running low on energy, from lack of
treats), I headed down stairs. Only to be greeted by another break in routine. Just what the hell is going on? Out came
the lead and I just couldn’t help myself. I love breakfast but I’d give it all
up if we go for a walk. So off we went to my usual haunt, I checked and replied
to my Pee-mails before we set off in a rather unusual direction. Before I knew
it we had turned up at an old house, an old house that I had been to before.
We went in and unbelievable
smells engulfed my senses; I stretched my neck and puffed my cheeks to get the
full whiff. As I caught sight of a moving box on a child’s lap, I moved in for
a closer look but it only scurried further. But then, with pricked ears I
spotted…oh my…a cat…in a cage.
“Olive,” said a voice.
There she was, the gentle blonde woman
who would soon be known as my nemesis, the maniac in blue.
I could feel the panic, the sad
look on dad’s face as this maniac walked me away from him told a thousand tales.
What’s going on? No treats, no dinner and now some crazed random is taking me
into a bright white room. I couldn’t take it anymore but before I could hatch
my plan, I fell asleep. If it wasn’t for this sore tooth, I would have thought
of something quicker.
I opened my eyes to a smiling
face and finally some food. It was a bit squidgier than I was used to but I ate
it all the same. There must have been alcohol in it because I was a bit wobbly.
Finally, the maniac was gone and
before I knew it, mum and dad were waiting for me.
It turns out that someone had the
bright idea to take out twelve of my teeth but since that day, the lingering
fish smell has disappeared. However the distinct lack of wit from my ‘family’
has not. If I have to hear them sing ‘All I want for Christmas is my two front
teeth’ one more time, there is going to be a brown surprise in the hallway.
.JPG)
